


The Nightmare

by Ailelie, Cinaed



Series: Enduring Legends [18]
Category: Merlin (TV)
Genre: Father-Daughter Relationship, Gen, Nightmares, No season 4 spoilers, Reincarnation
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-12-14
Updated: 2011-12-14
Packaged: 2017-10-27 08:36:21
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 960
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/293807
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ailelie/pseuds/Ailelie, https://archiveofourown.org/users/Cinaed/pseuds/Cinaed
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p><i>Wednesday, December 14 2011</i></p><p>In which Gwen has a nightmare, and she and her father discuss holiday plans.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Nightmare

**Author's Note:**

> This contains a brief flashback to season 1's "To Kill the King."

_Wednesday, December 14, 2011_

Gwen woke with a gasp, reaching out blindly. Her shaking hands skidded across her blanket, the fabric too soft and all wrong--

 _The horse blanket scratched her palms as she clutched at her father’s too-still leg, but it was a distant pain, nothing compared to the way her chest felt, cracked open and emptied of everything but grief and loss, the unending sobs ripping from her throat--_

She had her cell phone in her hand. It wasn’t until it began to ring that she realized she’d even pressed a button.

“Gwen?” Her father’s voice was roughened by sleep. “It’s 4 in the morning….” There was a rustling sound, and she imagined him sitting upright and squinting at the alarm clock. Concern sharpened his voice as he asked, “Is everything okay?”

Gwen opened her mouth, but instead of words, another sob tore from her throat. Her face was wet with tears, she realized, and swiped at her eyes with the hand not clutching her phone. “Sorry,” she forced past trembling lips. The sobs rattled her entire body as she gasped and struggled to breathe, to get some control over herself. “Sorry, bad dream, just-- talk to me. Please.”

“Okay, Gwennie,” Tom said gently. He made a little considering noise in the back of his throat. “Well, you know the first rules of shop—one, wear your goggles at all times, and two, don’t go near the equipment unless I’m supervising. Well, yesterday I stepped outside the room to talk to the principal about the holiday show. I come in, and what do you think this kid’s doing? Trying to show off to his girlfriend with one of the machines and about to lose his thumb in the process.”

Her father kept talking, recounting story after story as Gwen tried to calm herself down. The dream stayed with her, though, so real that she could feel the way the sun had beat down on her as she’d stumbled after the cart, the dust-crusted leather of her father’s boot as she clutched at him and tried to deny the truth.

It seemed like hours but was probably only ten minutes or so before Gwen finally got herself under control. Her father must have heard the steadiness of her breathing because he stopped halfway through a story about one of his fellow teachers and asked, “Do you want to talk about it, sweetheart?”

“Not really,” Gwen said with a weak laugh. Her eyes were itchy and her throat hurt. She’d have to drink some cold water unless she wanted to sound hoarse at the hospital today. 

Tom paused. “Was the nightmare-- was it about your mother?” he asked. She could hear an echo of her grief in his voice.

“No,” Gwen said. She closed her eyes, took in a deep breath. No, this dream had been nothing like the nightmares she’d endured after her mother’s death, dreams in which she searched her house, getting more and more distressed over the fact that something was missing, although she hadn’t known what, exactly, was gone. Gwen shook her head even though she knew her father couldn’t see the gesture. “I haven’t had one of those in a while. It was--” Her throat tightened, and she had to clear her throat before she continued. “It wasn’t about anything real.” Even if it had felt like a memory rather than a nightmare.

Tom was silent for a long moment. She wished she could see his face, figure out what he was thinking. Her father had always worn his emotions on his face for all to see. “You can change your plane tickets, can’t you? Without any extra charge?” he asked.

Gwen blinked. “I think so,” she said. “Why?”

“Change the tickets so that I’m visiting you instead,” her father said.

“Dad,” Gwen protested.

“No objections,” Tom said. It was his ‘nothing will change my mind’ voice. Gwen sighed a little at hearing it, because there was really no point in arguing when he got that particular stubborn tone. “Besides,” he added, obviously trying to sound lighthearted, “Adam came to visit me this weekend. I should return the favor.” 

“All right, I’ll change the tickets in the morning,” she said, and then winced at the bright red numbers reminding her that it technically already _was_ morning. “I’m sorry for waking you up like that. It was just a dream, I shouldn’t--” 

“Gwen,” her father said firmly. “You never have to apologize. You can _always_ call me.” He paused again. “And talk to me about anything. You know that, right?”

“I know I can,” Gwen said, feeling tears prick at the corners of her eyes again. For a moment she was tempted to tell him everything like she’d told Adam, but then she thought of how she’d sound, her voice hoarse from her crying fit as she talked about possible hallucinations and dreams that felt like memories, about recognizing a man she’d never met before except in dreams. She’d figure this out. Then she’d tell him what had been going on. “Thanks,” she said instead. “I love you.”

“I love you too,” Tom said.

“Try and get some sleep,” Gwen whispered, and heard a soft laugh in answer.

“I have to be up in a half-hour anyway. I think I’ll take the extra time and make myself a decent breakfast for once,” he said.

Gwen managed a smile. “Sounds good. I think I’ll do the same,” she said, even though she was anything but hungry. Her stomach roiled at the thought of breakfast. “Talk to you later, Dad.”

“Love you, Gwennie,” Tom said again.

Gwen ended the call and then sat in the semi-darkness for a moment, watching as light began to creep through her window.       

**Author's Note:**

> Written by Cinaed and beta-read by Ailelie.


End file.
